There is a hierarchy in our family, as I’m sure there is in any family with multiple children. We have a daredevil, a non-conformist and a snitch. Who occupies these roles at any given minute is subject to change.
When the boys are in bed, however, there is no ambiguity. Jack is the lord and master of the bedroom, and Lennon is his minion.
It took us a while to figure this out. Every nap and bedtime, Lennon would knock on the door, waiting patiently for one of us to come and bring him a sippy of water or a new diaper or to tuck him back in. Gradually, the requests were less about his wants and more about Jack.
“Jack wants something to drink.” “Jack needs a new diaper.” “Jack wants a different toy.”
I assumed Lennon was just being the caretaker he tends to be, and looking out for his big brother. On our recent move, though, the truth came out.
Jack and Lennon have always shared a room, and on our vacation they shared a bed, too. Since we all stayed in the same room, we were privvy to their bedtime conversations that had hitherto been behind closed doors.
Even though we were mere feet away, Lennon still told us when Jack needed something, usually after much whispering. During one nap time, I caught the conversation.
Jack: “I need a new diaper. Can you cry about it?”
Lennon, sobbing: “Mom! Dad! Jack needs a new diaper.”
Amazing. Jack has his own trained monkey.
We have been trying to break the invisible hold Jack has over Lennon, but they both seem oddly comfortable in their roles.
I’m wondering how this will play out in high school.
UPDATE 11 MARCH 2011:
Jack and Lennon are both now quite potty trained, but this behaviour has not changed. If Jack has to potty in the middle of the night, he stands at his brother’s bedside kicking him until he wakes up. Then Lennon is to come get one of us and inform us that Jack has to go. In the meantime, Jack does a sad potty dance, waiting. We have repeatedly told Jack that he is allowed to get up and go to the bathroom whenever he has the need (as Lennon does), but he refuses.
Either old habits die hard or he’s just not ready to give up his manservant.
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