The Boy Who Waits

Posted by on Apr 13, 2011 | 5 comments

I have three children.  It may seem at times like I only have Jack, as his needs often circumsede those of everyone else, but there are, in fact, three of them.  It’s become obvious of late that my middle child is in need of more attention.

Lennon was four months old when Jack started his services.  He will be four years old tomorrow.  In the last three and a half years Lennon has watched his brother live an exciting life.  Jack has had playmates come to the house several times a week (speech and ABA therapists).  He’s gotten to play in several different fun gyms where he could climb and swing and blow bubbles (occupational therapy).  He has also gone to school, almost every day, where he’s gotten to play and sing and paint and enjoy the company of several dedicated friends (BIs, speech therapists and special ed teachers).

Through it all Lennon has waited patiently.  He has waited in offices and vestibules and the van.  He has clung to my side in the preschool, wanting desperately to play with their kitchen setup or blocks.  On the special occasions where siblings were invited to attend (holiday parties, school trick-or-treating, graduation), he has participated with gusto.

My husband and I have not deprived Lennon of social interaction or adventure.  We make sure he gets lots of playground time, and we routinely explore museums and natural wonders as a family.  We’ve known, though, that soon it would not be enough.  Lennon has been getting bored.


He still enjoys our playground time and adventures, but we can tell he’s searching for more.  In an attempt to quench that thirst, we enrolled him in several 45-minute classes through our local Recreation Centre.  One of the greatest things about living where we do now is the thriving recreation system; the community centres offer lots of affordable classes and lessons for all ages, as well as pools and gyms and social interaction.

Lennon started his classes last week.  He’s currently taking a preschool art class, a theatre class and a dancing/singing class.   He loves to sing and dance, and he chose those classes over hockey and soccer and baseball.  The art class was my idea.  Jack does arts and crafts all day at school, comes home. where he loves to draw and paint and create 3D art.   Lennon, however, won’t colour.  He won’t glue and he won’t create.  His explanation?  “I can’t.”  We think that after years of watching Jack making art, he’s become intimidated.  He defers to Jack a lot, and that was the final straw for me.  (I am happy to report that Lennon is really enjoying his art class and has created a few paintings and crayon drawings already.)

The daunting reality, though, is that while we truly believe Lennon will be ready for Kindergarten in the fall (which would solve all jealousy problems), he won’t be old enough.  In British Columbia children must be five years old by December 31st of the calendar year they enter Kinder, and Lennon won’t be five until April of 2012.  I fear a few 45-minute experiences a week won’t be enough to counter the boredom.

Faced with another year of Lennon withering on the vine, we thought about the possibility of putting him in preschool this fall.  It would only be three days a week (and a big financial sacrifice on our part), and we weren’t sure it would be worth it.  We debated a homeschool program with a neighbor and her son, who is Lennon’s age.

Last week after his first class, we were picking Jack up from school.  As Jack got in the van, Lennon told him excitedly, “Jack!  I go to school now, just like you!”

My heart shattered into a million pieces.

Lennon starts preschool in September.

Going to school

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